Came across this dandy little bit of writing, thought to share.
Good-bye 2013!
Hello 2014!
xo e

It's been two years... Of course my experience with cancer continues to influence me, but there have been weeks, if not months, when it hasn't crossed my mind.  The blog was completely forgotten!  It feels good to write.
On April 15 I went in for a third yearly MRI. It's been THAT long. How many of you have been through MRI machines? No one told me it would be like standing inside a bell while it was being rung! After that first one, I cried and needed hugs and delicious food. This has become my formula for dealing with that necessary evil: MRI + Jeff + lunch at the chanch.  Jeff is working on his phD, and tends to be able to accommodate my needs in this regard (admittedly, he is uncomfortable with the hugging).  I hope he is available again next year, though I am getting better at handling it.  Next time, I've promised myself, I will forgo the dye injection part of the MRI. That will improve my experience by at least 30%.
Before the second MRI, I dreamed there was a cancer growing inside my ribs, poking my lung. The MRI requisition did not include the lungs - breasts only - but the dream prompted a change, initiated by my supportive shrink. The MRI showed scarring from radiation on the inner chest wall, affecting the lung. Dreams and psychiatrists can be very helpful.  
Controversially, I have also decided to forgo mammograms.  The way I see it, granted this goes against my doctor's recommendations, but there has been more than enough radiation exposure and discomfort in that area of my body. It wasn't a mammogram that found the Lump in the first place. The MRI will provide enough information for me, even without the nasty dye.
In other news, the artist-run centre Modern Fuel has accepted my project proposal for next year's exhibition schedule. After all the cancer treatments were done, when I realized I'd survived and had even recovered enough to emerge from menopause, I had a vision, and that's what the project is based on.  The show will be next summer.  I hope everyone will come.  
That's all for now.  I won't go so long without writing again, whether you're reading or not.
xoxox

Pink Ribbons, Inc., The Movie

Here's a trailer for the film, in case you haven't the energy for the book.

Further Reading

Pink Ribbons Inc. was inspirational. I've moved on to BRIGHT-SIDED by my new hero Barbara Ehrenreich. Chapter one delves directly into the trouble with positive thinking for people with breast cancer. I recommend you read it. If not the whole book, at least the chapter "Smile or Die: The Bright Side of Cancer". It's delightfully insightful.

Unsurprisingly, for people who know me, I've developed a fair bit of ambivalence about my experience with breast cancer. If I'd known then what I know now...

Memories...

There's a quirky little memory, that came back to me this week... on December 5th in 2009, waiting for the surgeon to perform the lumpectomy, I found myself reading an essay which questions the efficacy of mammograms in Malcolm Gladwell's What the Dog Saw. Memory is a funny thing, though.  Maybe I read that essay January 6th 2010, waiting for the surgeon to perform the auxiliary node dissection. The point is, I've just learned that the auxiliary node dissection has been proven to have no benefit for the patient. That surgery caused me far more pain and trouble than the partial mastectomy and it wasn't necessary. I'm angry.
A few weeks ago, I joined the Shout Sisters for my first choral performance. It was fun. The audience enjoyed us more than anticipated. The event was a fundraiser for Breast Cancer Research in Gananoque. There were giant pink ribbons everywhere. We were asked to wear black, with a pink accessory. My choir buddy, Anna, didn't wear any pink. That was because she doesn't actually own anything pink. But on the drive home, I mentioned my vague discomfort with the whole pink-ribbon business.
"Well," she said, "I'm uncomfortable with it, too"
On she went to describe an interview she'd heard on the CBC. Turns out, there's a professor at Queen's who published a book called Pink Ribbons Inc. - Breast Cancer and the Politics of Philanthropy. So, you know, I got it from the library. Samantha King's book packs some major punches, and mostly reads like a doctoral thesis, but the information in it names many of the creepy issues stalking the pink ribbon campaign.

Diet

This week, I met with a woman named Diane Dawber who is part of an incredible nutrition and health study group called Health Pursuits. She gave me a copy of the group's book A New Spin on the Rotation Diet.

I'm using it as a reference and guide book while I modify my diet to exclude dairy and wheat products. It's pretty exciting.

Now-a-days, things go fairly smoothly. Right now you find me on a mini-vacay, enjoying the company of loved ones in Ottawa. Back in Kingston, though, I have something of a schedule to boast about.

There is a wonderful group of choirs in this part of Ontario, organized by singer Georgette Fry. They are choirs for women, requiring no audition, no expertise, only the will to sing in a group. I go every week. Singing was recommended as a tool to improve my health and I believe it is working.

Another tool I've recently started using is the Health Recovery class at the Taoist Tai Chi Society. After months of struggling with weird sensations that appeared after working out, I sought out this class. It feels great. It turns out Tai Chi is just my speed. I go twice a week.

Curling takes up my Sunday afternoons. It's so fun to get together with my not too modest team, Brooms of Glory. The great thing about losing is: the winning team buys our drinks. Thanks to KSSC.

So, I probably won't write for some time, unless something pertinent, comes up. So long, for now. Keep well. Thanks for reading, being interested and keeping in touch. Your feedback has been a real boon to my sense of belonging.
Hamdulillah.